my second mother’s day, and the second baby is almost here.
time is passing quickly, so quickly.
what will the next year hold? 10 new little fingers, 10 new little toes. New baby smells and sounds. Emma’s first words. A little life beginning to explore the world, with a sister just barely older than he.
and God only knows what else.
one thing is sure – it will never be dull!
Easter is just a few days away. It is a season that is precious to us believers. Sadly, it can be hugely commercialized (all those Easter bunnies laying eggs …..), and it needs to be celebrated in a God-glorifying way. I love what Nancy Wilson said over on her blog about celebrating it with traditions, traditions that are both solemn as we recognize the enormity of what Christ did, and joyfully childlike as we celebrate His victory and our freedom.
I have a wonderful husband. I really do.
We were driving home from church the other day and I mentioned how “the baby” must really be wanting some Peeps and a chocolate bunny …..
He bought me some.
They’re only $1 at Walmart, but it made me feel so very loved and cherished. Isn’t he just wonderful?
I love him.
I’ve posted something on the market blog again (yes, it gets updated really randomly – sorry about that). If you are interested in buying a few of the new spring pretties, you can find them here.
And we having wonderful spring weather!!! It’s finally gotten into the 70s here, and I’m loving it. :) Emma wore a pair of shorts today for the first time this year.
One of the men in our church sang this during the service yesterday, and it brought me to tears (I had to borrow a Kleenex from the lady ahead of me). I recommend listening to it if you have time this morning. It is so good.
Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.
I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband.
And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God.
He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”
He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.”
-Revelation 21:1-5
Gramma Moose died yesterday morning. We knew that it was going to happen very soon and were expecting it at any moment, but still, we are mourning (and rejoicing for her).
For the past several days I have been thinking about her, about her life and my memories of her.
There are so very many wonderful memories, but the one that is sticking out at the top right now is of syrup. The picture of little pitchers of maple syrup sums up many of my memories of Gramma.
Maple syrup (I can’t remember any other kind in her house) in little pitchers with pancakes or Belgian waffles was almost always a part of our visits with Gramma. In everything she did she tried to be and do her absolute best, even if it cost her a little more, so that she might bless those around her. If it cost more, she just graciously made do with less or saved somewhere else and didn’t let it interfere with her goal of making the time special.
Little pitchers were important too, so that each person would have their own by their plate because each person was individually important. Gramma was one of six children and she understood how very important it is for a child or an adult to feel thought of, special as an individual and not just part of the larger group.
There are so many memories, good and wonderful memories.
Maybe I’ll share them with you later ………
Yes, I know that it is 3:30 in the morning.
But I’ve noticed that this funny thing happens to me when I’m pregnant – my normally sound sleep (very sound, as in, almost comatose) gets much lighter and I can hear sounds through my sleep. Sounds like the road repair blocks away and the downstairs neighbors’ toilet running. And I wake up.
Sleep flees for a while and I am left lying in bed next to John, trying not to wake him, thinking in the middle of the night (and trying not to be annoyed by being awakened by mere water running or distant jackhammering).
Tonight as I was lying there thinking random (would it be really rude of me to knock on the neighbor’s door and ask them if I can adjust their toilet float thingy for them? it would, wouldn’t it ….) and not so random thoughts (gratefulness for the warm strong arm that tightens around me when I stir), I spent some time thinking and praying about this little baby that is making it’s way into our lives. A new little – unexpected – bundle to love and care for. Our second child. Due June 1. He or she already has all of their appendages formed and movable, has ten discernible fingers, is developing neurons at an astonishing rate and is still the size of a large grape.
So tiny. And yet has a soul. It is our baby, entrusted to our care by God.
I was so surprised to find out that God’s plans for our family were – once again – different than I had planned (I really shouldn’t be surprised by that, but I always am. It’s almost as if I actally expect God to follow my plan or something …). I pretty much came up sputtering and dazed. It took me nearly a week before I was able to wrap my mind around having another baby in seven months (and if you’re counting, yes, that will make Emma 15 months old).
My absolute first response, though, as I stared at the positive test was, “God’s plan is better.”
Because it is.
Not only is His plan better, but it is perfect.
One of my all time favorite verses in James 1:17: Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.
Good and perfect gifts from our Father. Because He is good and perfect, He cannot give any other kind. Oh, some of His gifts may seem untimely or out of place, but they aren’t. They are just right for us now.
In the same way that we in our finiteness delight to give to our own children, He delights to give us gifts, good gifts that will bless us (Matt 7: 11).
I know that the next few years will be full to bursting and there will be difficult days. But it will be good.
Because God is blessing us, rewarding us, giving us joy (Psalm 127:3-5). There really is no greater honor than to be entrusted with the care of a child, and now God has given us two.
I love being a mother. I really do. Mothering a smiling and joyful (and willful …) baby is just so wonderful. Sometimes when I look back at my day, though, it seems as if all my effort accomplished nothing. True, the laundry has been washed, dishes done, diapers changed. But at the end of the day it is hard to tell because all of that “doing” is waiting to be done all over again. There are no marks of achievement when is comes to housework.
Emma is teething just now, and today she just wants to held as she sucks her thumb or trills to me as she plays with my hair. It is difficult to get much accomplished while carrying a nearly 20 pound baby, and combined with her want for more nursing and less “real” food, I am feeling a bit tired! So we have been sitting at the computer and I have been catching up on reading blogs as Ems absorbs comfort. As I was reading I found that this woman’s post from last week was good and very timely.
It reminded me of the story of how David’s mighty men went down to Bethlehem to get him some water from the well, and instead of drinking it he poured it out on the ground as a drink offering (II Sam 23:14-17). Of course, David had a purpose for pouring out the water – to him it represented the life blood of the men who had brought it for him – but I have always seen it from his men’s view as well: they so wanted him to have this water that meant so much to him, and then he poured it out instead of drinking it. All their effort gone. But their effort wasn’t gone. It was being used as an offering of praise.
The blog author was convicted about her setting “seen” accomplishments as idols in her heart. It was so good to read her transparency. I stopped to ponder: Can I go from needing a visible, tangible product of my labor to allowing it to be poured out before God?
Emma is just too precious. I don’t think I am able to not photograph her. Well, I could if I was forced to, but I would still be taking pictures with my mind. Those dimples will stretch out to knobby-ness all too soon (although I think she will keep her habit of sleeping with her hands by her chin)!
the last few months of being pregnant with Emma found me dealing with emotions and battling fear. Not constantly, but still battling it. Being a slightly overconfident, self-sufficient, stubborn and fairly secure person, fear is a fairly foreign emotion for me. Especially the kind that made my heart race and woke me up with nightmares.
Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you may go. Joshua 1:9
I would all of a sudden become convinced that John was going to die, and I would have to give birth and raise Emma alone, or I would be overcome by the possibility that Emma could be born with severe defects. John would wake up and pray with me, over me and for me. I memorized and meditated on scripture about trusting God, about not fearing. And it helped.
God is able to make all grace abound to you … II Corinthians 9:8
