John had to work on Sunday, so it was just me and the little ones going to church. We dropped him off (kisses all around – Emma loves giving kisses right now) and then Emma asked me to turn on the music (she also loves to sing and “dance” in her carseat as we’re driving).

After a few minutes “No Matter What” by Kerrie Roberts came on:

I’m running back to Your promises one more time
Lord that’s all I can hold on to
I gotta say this has taken me by surprise, but nothing surprises You
Before a heartache can ever touch my life
It has to go through Your hands
And even though I keep asking why, I keep asking why

No matter what, I’m gonna love You
No matter what I’m gonna need You
I know You can find a way to keep me from the pain
But if not, if not, I’ll trust You no matter what, no matter what

When I’m stuck and there’s nothing else by myself
I’m just sitting in silence
There’s no way I can make it without Your help, I won’t even try it
I know You have Your reasons for everything so I will keep believing
Whatever I might be feeling, God You are my hope
And You will be my strength

Anything I don’t have You can give it to me, but it’s OK if You don’t
I’m not here for those things
The touch of Your love is enough on its own
No matter what I still love You and I’m gonna need You

No matter what I’m gonna love You, no matter what I’m gonna need You
I know You can find a way to keep me from the pain
But if not, if not, I’ll trust You
I know You can find a way to keep me from the pain
But if not, but if not, I’ll trust You

No matter what
No matter no matter what
No matter no matter what
No matter no matter what

There was one line in particular that struck me, and as I pondered it, the truth that was in it ministered to my spirit as much – or maybe more than? – the fellowship and sermon that we enjoyed later that morning.
Before a heartache can ever touch my life
It has to go through Your hands

While I know that God is sovereign and permits trials to come into our lives for our benefit, I sometimes realize that I have forgotten that God is with me, before and behind, in my heartache as well as my joy.

It is easy for me to forget that He doesn’t just allow any pain to come into my life, no, just that which He is using to shape me for His glory.

Everything He does has purpose, and everything that He allows to touch me will end up being for my good – even the things that really hurt, the things that – at the time – I wish never happened.
It all goes through God’s hands before it touches me.
I can trust Him.
Even when I can’t see the hope through my tears, I can trust Him.

(nothing is going on right now, just in case you are wondering!)