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Category: sorrow

Bella

Bella

“If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans.”
-Jose in the movie Bella

Anna, Mom, some friends and I went to go see Bella on Monday night. It’s a good movie, a very good movie. It is a movie about despair about hope, about joy, love, about life. It is about grace. It is a movie that you should definitely consider seeing.

What plans have you made? Has God laughed?

“..you say, ‘Today or tomorrow, we shall go to such and such a city, … yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. … You ought to say, ‘If the Lord wills, we shall live and also do this or that.'”
-James 4:13-15

What plans have I made? Have I considered that the result of “my” plans is ultimately in the Lord’s hands? The movie gave me things to ponder, to think about. For example, the idea that a tragedy doesn’t have to end as a tragedy, but can become a source of beauty. It can become bella.

tears and joy

tears and joy

Tonight I realized again how much it hurts me when those I love are hurting. I also remembered the joy I feel when those I love experience joy and beauty.
There are so many wonderful things happening right now. So many things that bring joy. But I – and those around me – are also learning some painful, yet valuable, lessons. I am learning what it means to hope, really hope. Not in those around me, situations, or what “might be”, but in the true constant. God never fails us, never lets us down, never disappoints, because He is the only One that truly is perfect.
When I see or feel that the ones I love are hurting, I want to take away that pain, remove their sorrow. I want them to have joy again. But I am learning that joy comes through sorrow, comes through enduring the pain. I am learning that joy comes from a closer walk with our Father. So, if I truly love them, will I try to remove their pain?
Oh, I want them to experience beauty, experience that utter joy! Nothing make my heart skip more than sharing in someone’s joy. I want to be able to experience that beauty with them.

I wanna start it over
I wanna start again
I want a new a new beginning
One without any end
I feel it inside
Calling out to me

It’s a voice that whispers my name
It’s a kiss without any shame
Something beautiful
Like a song that stirs in my head
Singing love will take us where
Something beautiful

I’ve heard it in the silence
Seen it on a face
I’ve felt it in a long hour
Like a sweet embrace
I know this is true
It’s calling out to me

It’s a voice that whispers my name
It’s a kiss without any shame
Something beautiful
Like a song that stirs in my head
Singing love will take us where
Something beautiful

It’s the child on her wedding day
It’s the daddy that gives her away–Father
Something beautiful
When we laugh so hard we cry
It’s the love between you and I
Something beautiful
-the newsboys, ‘something beautiful”

Learning – to trust and obey

Learning – to trust and obey

2007-10-22 fall leaf, silver maple, originally uploaded by Lizi Beth.

 When we walk with the Lord 
 in the light of his word, 
 what a glory he sheds on our way! 
 While we do his good will, 
 he abides with us still, 
 and with all who will trust and obey. 

 Not a burden we bear, 
 not a sorrow we share, 
 but our toil he doth richly repay; 
 not a grief or a loss, 
 not a frown or a cross, 
 but is blest if we trust and obey. 
 
 But we never can prove 
 the delights of his love 
 until all on the altar we lay; 
 for the favor he shows, 
 for the joy he bestows, 
 are for them who will trust and obey. 
 
 Then in fellowship sweet 
 we will sit at his feet, 
 or we'll walk by his side in the way; 
 what he says we will do, 
 where he sends we will go; 
 never fear, only trust and obey. 
 
 Trust and obey, for there's no other way 
 to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.
-John H. Sammis (1846-1919), “Trust and Obey”





I have been learning – and re-learning – to “trust and obey” recently. Learning through tears, through pain, through joy and laughter, and everything in between. I used to sing this song rather glibly, hardly paying attention to the lyrics I was singing. But I heard it again the other night, and pondered it.
Trust.
Obey.
All on the altar we lay.
Trust.
Obey.
I desperately want to see my plans happen, or at least solidified. But each time I try to finalize a certain project, it gets foiled. This project is very dear to my heart, and I have shed many tears over it. Finally, I gave it to Him. Finally, I relinquished my control and trusted.
What will happen? I do not know. But I am learning to trust and obey. Trusting when there seems no hope seems foolish. But I am learning.




 




 








							


	

			




						
							



	
		
	
	
	
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Know therefore that the LORD your GOD, He is GOD, the faithful God, Who keeps His covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love Him and keep His commands.


-Deuteronomy 7:9


Give to the wind your fear
Hope and be undismayed
God hears your sighs and counts your tears
God will lift up, God will lift up, lift up your head
God will lift up your head
God will lift up your head
God will lift up your head
Lift up your head
Leave to His sovereign sway
To choose and to command
Then shall we wandering on His way
Know how wise and how strong
How wise and how strong
How strong is His hand
God will lift up your head
God will lift up your head
God will lift up your head
Lift up your head
Through waves and clouds and storms,
He gently clears the way
Wait because in His time, so shall this night
Soon end in joy, soon end in joy
Soon end in joy, soon end in joy
Soon end in joy, soon end in joy
God will lift up your head
(Soon end in joy)
God will lift up your head
(Soon end in joy)
-“god will lift up your head”, by jars of clay


Sometimes it seems as if God is only ever taking away, never blessing. Those times are when you are overwhelmed by sorrow, and cannot see His hand. But He is there, He does see your tears, and He will come through. He always takes away before He gives. There must be a need before He can fill it.


Sunday He took a friend Home.
I went to that man’s funeral today. And grieved. Grieved for the man’s wife, his children, his grandchildren. Grieved for all the hundreds of people who had lost a dear friend. That included me.
God will lift up your head.
Yes.
I know.
I know.
But I still grieve.
It seems as if this year has been one of extreme emotion, swinging from joy to sorrow to joy and back to sorrow again.
God has been subtracting.
I am ready for Him to add.
Maybe He already is.


In the meantime, I will trust.
He has hitherto been faithful, and I know that He will continue to be so.
Even though my eyes are blinded by tears and I can hardly see my way, I will trust Him.


For such is God,
Our God forever and ever;
He will guide us until death.


-Psalm 48:14
yet even death cannot part us from Him or His love (Romans 8:38-39).


So I trust.